I received this in an email the other day and thought it would give you all a giggle. It’s too good not to share…..and right on the button!
The Man Rules
Finally, the blokes side of the story. We always hear ‘the rules’ from thefemale side, but here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note: these are all numbered ‘1’……….ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. Youdon’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on thisone: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints donot work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almostevery question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want helpsolving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in anargument. In fact, all comments becomenull and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’task us!
1. If something we said can be interpreted twoways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how youwant it done. Not both. If youalready know best how to do it, just doit yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to sayduring commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directionsand neither do we.
1. ALL men see inonly 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say ‘nothing,’ we willact like nothing is wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just notworth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything youwear is fine….really.
1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you areprepared to discuss such topics as football…..in fact, sport in general.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you forreading this. Yes, I know, I have tosleep on the couch tonight. But did you know men really don’t mindthat? It’s like camping.
Pass this to as many men as you can – to give them a laugh.
Pass this to as many women as you can – togive them an even bigger laugh.
Hope this gave you a little giggle.